It's not a phase

As i grew up i never felt like my other girlfriends felt about getting on the mommy track. I am not meant to be a domestic goddess and the idea of birthing a child freaks me out. After receiving detailed descriptions of why my friend had to have reconstructive surgery after the birth of her second child i decided it would be adoption or nothing. These are not thoughts that you are supposed to have in a heterosexual relationship though. The other day when the breadmaker and i were heading back from a trip to Vermont i stopped to check the oil and windshield washer fluid before we hit the road. I liked doing it. I don't know that i would be able to do that in a heterosexual relationship. there are so many parts of myself that I love that i could not express in a het relationship. I love my breadmaker and it makes me happy to work and go to school and provide for her. I am realistic and understand that we may not always be able to have one of us at home, but i hope that we can.