The Courage to Be ImPerfect: Island Fun

We arrived in Phuket and of course had to haggle a taxi to take us to our hotel which was quite a ways from the airport. We settled in and after dinner our first stop was of course the Hard Rock Cafe. It was a really nice on in fact the best one I’ve seen in Asia so far. They had an extensive collection of guitars and clothes. I got to see a Springsteen jean jacket, a collection of Beach Boys Hawaiian shirts and my personal favourite one of Stevie Nicks fringe laden robes. After our stop at HRC we wandered around the market place which was not a very fun experience. It wasn’t a market place as much as over 100 small bars lined up all promotion drink specials. Now usually I’m all for a cheap drink at an outdoor bar but not when every single bar come equipped with stripper poles. To say that it was a skeezy place is an understatement and the cherry on top of this uncomfortable sundae was watching a Lady Boy strip outside of his hut. The combo of his botched boob job and Barbie doll looking nether region let Laura and I know it was time to hit the 7/11 and head home to watch Harry Potter with Liz.

Hard Rock Phuket

The next day was beach day and it was glorious. After so long travelling through the rest of SE Asia it was nice to be back on the sand even if it was really crowded. I mentioned earlier that it was weird for me to see a burqa up close; it was far weirder seeing a burqa swimsuit. Picture a woman playing in the sea with her children in what can truly be described as a swimming “costume” as my British pals like to say. When they were walking along the beach they looked like some sort of performance troop. Really, throwing all other opinions aside, I just kept thinking about how hot they must have been.

Phuket was cool but it wasn’t a city for me and I was excited to head out to our next destination Phi Phi. We docked, booked our accommodation and then waited for a taxi. When a man with a glorified wheelbarrow showed up I was a little perplexed. Phi Phi is such a small island that one can walk everywhere and the taxis are really there to help with luggage. We quickly decided that this was not a place to stay sober and found Jordan’s Irish Pub a place with 3 for 1 buckets. We also found that they had a DJ that would play pretty much anything we requested so we had our own private dance party and it was great. We decided to check out the beach which was really insane. Fire Dancers, black lights, fireworks and of course more buckets. None of us truly recall getting home that night but we know we were together. What we do recall of the evening was really fun.

I swear I'm wearing clothes

Second day was hangover and beach day and I’ve gotta say the beach was really dirty, must have been from the all night party the night before. That evening as we snuggled into bed Laura realized that her crackers had been tampered with. A mouse must have gotten into our bungalow and munched down. It was gross but not the end of the world and we all relaxed to read. About 10 minutes later I felt a bug of some sort crawl from my knee down my leg and in the light of Laura’s kindle saw the giant cockroach scurry up the summit of my foot and dive over the side of the bed. I screamed and threw my body into a convulsive state once I realized exactly what was happening. The lights went on and we waited to see the vile creature again. Sure enough after about 3 minutes of working ourselves up we saw him climb up the wall. Liz, being the quick and logical thinker that she is grabbed a glass to trap it while Laura and I stood in a semi paralyzed state. After some work we trapped the roach in the glass and put the entire contraption outside. Little sleep was had in our bungalow that night and in the morning we discovered that our little vermin friend came back to eat Laura’s gum and my Lithium (we can safely assume he’s dead now). UGH!

Lizzy wasn’t feeling well the next day so she stayed home while Laura and I went on a speed boat trip around the islands near Phi Phi. The highlight of the day was by far Maya Bay. This is the island where The Beach with Leonardo dicapprio was filmed. It was phenomenal. White sand that was so soft it was like walking on a beach made of powder and water that was crystal clear and as warm as a bath. It was breathtaking in its beauty. I see what the movie described it as paradise and an island one would never want to leave. Our speed boat trip home was so bumpy I felt like I might puke or fall overboard at any moment but it was worth it to get to see such an awesome place. Phi Phi had great pizza and a few good bars but I’ll say I felt too old for that island and I don’t see myself ever visiting again.

Kho Phangan has been a blast. We got our resort for a fraction of the cost it would have been because Laura is an expert negotiator. Lying by the pool all day is a great way to spend a vacation. Since the beginning of the trip Liz has been excited to get motor bikes and I have been dreading the moment that I would actually have to try to ride one. Well the other day it came and I really didn’t think that I was going to be able to do it, neither did Liz or Laura. Once I got the hang of it and didn’t think that I was going to die at every turn I started to enjoy myself. Now I’m psyched and think about getting a bike now! Being on a bike is so freeing and not to mention a great way to cool down from the island heat.

Biker Babes

Wow look at the rack on that mermaid

We have ridden our bikes all around the island including two trips to see elephants. I love elephants and have since I was a little kid so being able to finally pet and feed them had been a dream come true. They are so beautiful and smart and it kills me that they are used for treks but I’m happy to go feed them bananas and pet their trunks.